Archive for November, 2005

Journey to Paradise II

Tuesday, November 29th, 2005

From the airport, we were taken to Western Hill for a picturesque view of Kunming and temples up the hill. Along the way, our guide sang a beautiful song to us. He explains that there is a sayDscn1034ing that says " If you can walk, you can

Picture1-Dolls wearing ethnics costumes of Yunnan

dance.If you can talk, you can sing." True enough all our guides can sing very well and even our bus driver in Lijiang who doesn’t talk much and look very fierce sang an ethnic song to us.

On the way down Western Hill, I asked a lady tour guide from other groups who were wearing an ethnic costume to take picture with me addressing her as xioa jie and she refused. Later I found out that they find it insult to call them xiao jie which for them has no difference with refering them to those in vice activities. I also found out that in Kunming, ladies were addressed as Ah Shi Ma, in Lijiang they are called Pang Jing Mei (means the dark and fat which for them is beautiful- no joke! ) and in Shangri-La is called Zhou Ma (which also sounds like sitting on the horse) and in Dali, Jing Hua (which means golden flower). If only we can recall so much so there are times that I called them by other names…instead of Jing Hua, I called Ching Hua (frog in chinese) without realising it.

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Picture 2-Stone Forest

One of the wonder in Kunming is the Stone Forest. Like its name, it is a forest covered with karst stones more than seven feets high, very much like the stalagmites in the caves. The only difference is that these stones sprout out from the ground.

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Picture 3- A lady in ethnic costume

On the third day, we flew from Kunming to Lijiang. It was a turbulent ride before reaching ground as the whole area is covered with mountains. It was very cold when we reached, around 19degC but at night, the weather dip to 5degC. My tour guide, a 22-year-old guy named Ah Niu greeted us with his Naxi ethnic costume and a long ponytail which he has kept for six years. The ponytail I feel is not part of their culture.

Picture4- Heilong pondDscn0999

We immediately toured Heilong (Black Dragon) pond which offered a serene view of the pond with a small hill and Yulong Snow Mountain as it’s backdrop, very much like those we see as the garden of the emperor in the movie. As Yunnan is covered with mountains and no where near the sea, they regarded the lakes as sea like Erhai (Ear Sea), Bitahai (Bita Sea) and etc as the chinese considered water as good fortune.

Picture5- The ancient town of Lijiang

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Then we went to the ancient town of Lijiang, made of two-storey of shops selling all kind of goods with roads made of natural stones radiating all around up the hill. Clear water from Yuquan River flows everywhere in the town and you can see the stream and brigdes connecting both side,making a very beautiful scenery.This town is declared as part of World Heritage. The shops open until late night. One particular road is lighted up bright red with lantterns where most pubs are. Two groups of party goers separated by the stream take turn singing their lungs out. My guide explained that this is the way guys get to know girls in the olden days with the groups separated to guys and girls and when they got to be together they will go hand-in-hand to another section to dance the ethnic music together.

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Picture6-9(From left to right) : First bend of the Yangtze river, Tiger leaping gorges, The Songzhanlin Monastery Shangri-La, a young monk chatting with his friend

On the fourth day, we proceed our four-hour-long journeys along the moutainous terrains up to Shangri-La. We stopped by the first bend of the Yangtze river. All along the way, the view is so spectacular. One could really feel the kind of lifestyle of the ethnic people along the mountains, so peaceful and relaxing. You see mountains after mountains and the snowcap of Yulong Snow Mountain accompanied us all the way.

We were greeted by another guide, a ZhouMa who will bring us to Shangri-La before we stopped at Tiger Leaping Gorges where fast moving river flows to the Yangtze,an ideal sport for river-rafting. The force of the wave hitting the stones can be hear from 100 feets high above the gorge. All the way down to the river bend, people selling stuffs and young children wearing ethnic costumes greeted us asking to take picture for RMB2. The lucky ones has fire by their side to keep warm while others were seen rubbing their palms. Worst, to take picture at a better location overlooking the beautiful gorge, the locals demanded RMB1 for each person entering the so-call zone.

Proceeding all the way up to Shangri-La which is above 9,000 feet above sea level, trees barely grows high, the land look dry and the sky is clear blue. Yaks grazing grasses and black furry pigs are common view at the highland. Shangri-La, the gateway to Tibet has only been open to the public in 1992. Buddhism is the main religion there and houses are built like tibet style with some having a pole with flags. According to my guide, one pole means there’s an elderly staying in the house, two poles mean there is someone praticing Dalai in the house and three means there is a Dalai in the house.

Dscn1322_1 Picture 10- the Yulong Snow Mountain

As we approached the Songzhanlin Monastery, I could really felt that I am in Tibet eventhough Shangri-La is very near to its border. We walked the stairs up the monastery and one has to be cautious not to run and jump in case we experience altitude sickness at 10,000 feet. Its different case with the monks there. I saw a senior monk chasing a few younger ones with a stick and the young monks were running and laughing loudly. We were adviced to step into the monastery with our left foot and with the right foot on the way out. Inside, monks were listening attentively to their lessons as we walked around with some offering prayers. 

The weather at night was cold but we were lucky as we were told that usually the wind is so strong we could hear a howling sound as it hits the windows. We were entertained to some local dances and sharing a whole boar and lamb within a small group each. We visited the Bitahai Lake, a large lake at 600 feets higher than Shangri-La in the morning before heading down to Lijiang.

Our last destination before heading further down the mountain is Yulong Snow Mountain which is above 5000m above sea level. We rode the cable car from 3356m to 4506m and along the way, the wind was blowing snow into the cable car. From there, we only managed to walk in thick snow up the stairway to  4546m because of the one hour timeframe given by our guide. As we waited for our cable car, one chinese lady had to rush her few months old baby down the mountain as her baby is dozing off due to lack of oxygen, quite an ignorant part of her.

Picture 11- The three pagodas of Dscn1360_1Dali

As we bid Shangri-La and Lijiang goodbye, we proceed our journey to Dali where we visited the three pagodas and TianLong Babu(the Hollywood of the east) where a few movies were filmed there. As we drove along the terrains mountains after mountains leaving Lijiang and Shangri-La far behind, the song that our Lijiang guide sang still ran deep in our hearts. I have no doubt why Shangri-La and Lijiang are called the paradise. As the song goes ( a direct translation from the chinese song) ,

             grasses and flowers beside the lake,

               sweet scented breeze from the wind,

               the place in my mind is far away,far away

               that unforgettable night, we dance around the fire,

               eyes in contact, full of mistery

               and friendship is found.

Journey To Paradise I

Friday, November 25th, 2005

How do you define paradise? Is it a place so beautiful it cativate the hearts of those who sees it. Another name to this place is called ‘Shangri-La’ , originally named ZongDian. Shangri-La is pronounce as (shănggrĭ-lä) n which is defines as.   

  1. An imaginary remote paradise on earth; utopia.
  2. A distant and secluded hideaway, usually of great beauty and peacefulness.

[After Shangri-La, the imaginary land in the novel Lost Horizon by James Hilton.]

"Shangri-La is a fictional place described in the novel, Lost Horizon, written by British writer James Hilton in 1933. In it, "Shangri-La" is a mystical, harmonious valley, gently guided from a lamasery, enclosed in the western end of the Himalaya. Shangri-La has become synonymous with any earthly paradise but particularly a mythical Himalayan utopia - a permanently happy land, isolated from the outside world. The story of Shangri-La is based on the concept of Shambhala, a mystical city in the Buddhist religion.

Several possible places in the Buddhist Himalaya between north India and Western China have been suggested as the actual basis for Hilton’s legend. In China, Tao Qian of the Jin Dynasty described a Shangri-La in his Story of the Peach Blossom Valley, for example. The legendary Kun Lun Mountains offer other possible Shangri-La valleys.

Today, various places claim the title, such as parts of northwestern Yunnan province, including the tourist destination of Lijiang. Places like Sichuan and Tibet also claim the real Shangri-la was in its territory. In 2001, Tibet Autonomous Region put forward a proposal that the three regions optimise all Shangri-la tourism resources and promote them as one. After failed attempts to establish a China Shangri-la Ecological Tourism Zone in 2002 and 2003, government representatives of Sichuan and Yunnan provinces and Tibet Autonomous Region signed a declaration of cooperation in 2004." (source taken from the net)Yunnans

I have read a few articles about how beautiful this place is but the pictures taken in a tourist brochure really captured both Edward and my hearts and we immediately knew that we wanted to see the place with our eyes. During the most recent Matta Fair, we booked ourselves for a 8days/7nights tour to Kunming,Lijang,Dali and Shangri-La.

I was not paying attention to what the lady holding a cute child was saying as I was about to board my tour bus outside the Kunming Airport only to realised later that she was asking for money. I was observing the city as the guide explained that Kunming is a condensed city with a high population so everyone is very willing to work hard for a small pay. All along the highways, people fully utilized the fat soils to plant trees or vegetation to eat or to earn money unlike in Malaysia where much land were left empty. I see women carrying babies on their back as they carried out their daily routines. I was amazed that in a big city, horses are still being used to help to do chores.

Kunming, capital of Yunnan Province, with a history of more than 2400 years, owes its importance to the fact that it was the gateway to the celebrated Silk Road that facilitated trade with Tibet, Sichuan, Myanmar and India.

Kunming is the focal point of Yunnan minority culture. Some 26 ethnic minorities such as Han, Yi, Bai, Miao, Dai, Hani and more inhabit the region. Each group has its own featured festivals such as the Torch festival of Yi people, the Golden Temple Fair and so on. (source taken from website www.travelchinaguide.com)

Unlike what was claimed "the City of Eternal Spring" that enjoy pleasant climate all year round, I was greeted with cold air. Never to my expectation, that was just the beginning to our cold journey.                       to be continue……..

Friend or lover?

Friday, November 11th, 2005

This is interesting. I read it on TheStar today and it immediately reflects on my close friend who recently felt that she missed her boat because she can’t see the signals coming from her colleague.

How often when two people starts as friends and slowly turns to be lovers? Most of the time isn’t it? But can friends remains as friends and nothing else? If one party secretly loves the other and then that someone founds a lover, 90% of the time, the friendship will be broken.

I have been innocent to this since I came from an all-girls school until I startly going to college where I started mixing with the opposite sex. A few guys I regards as friends turned out to have other intentions in mind. Once they knew you’re not interested in them, they started ignoring you. I was sturbborn enough not to believe that you can never have that kind of relationship until I failed a few times. Not that I never mixes with guys in secondary schools….surprisingly I still can mix so well with them eventhough I am married now. Of course there is a limitation to this girl-guy friendship. I always set a boundary to this kind of relationship as not to jeopardise the beautiful friendships we created. Agree?

Anyone who has a very close relationship with a guy or few of them, so close that it never turns into love? For married ones, if you do have such friendship, does your husband feels jealous of it? Gays are exception! For those who hasn’t read the article I mentioned, I attached it below. Enjoy! And to my friend who missed her boats, you got what it means?

Do we know the difference?

ALL A GIRL WANTS IS…By TRISHA RAJAH

…To have a real boyfriend. I don’t mean the romantic kind but the other type. The one you hug but never lock lips with.   

This is the guy who gives you the inside track on what really goes on at those bachelor parties and patiently explains why it’s important to take sides in Alien vs Predator

But there is a slight problem to this scenario. It brings up that enigmatic question – can men and women be just friends? Not friends who are secretly attracted to one another. I’m talking about simple, innocent friendship. 

It seems to me that post-kindergarten, all male-female ties add up to more than just friendship because physical or emotional connections eventually enter the equation. 

Last Saturday night at a dinner party in Mont Kiara, I asked some friends about platonic relationships between the sexes. The woman in the group said, yes, of course men and women can be friends, and immediately began naming her male buddies. Her husband didn’t seem so convinced.   

The rest (all men) took a lot longer to reply. They hummm-ed and they hah-ed until one of them piped up: “I think your definition of a platonic relationship is too strict,” he said, brow furrowed.   

“I mean, what’s wrong with picturing an attractive lady friend in a couple of compromising situations?”   

His buddy chimed in: “I think there’s nothing wrong with sleeping together as long as both parties know where they stand.” Hmmmm . . . that might be possible except for a small glitch – a platonic relationship is specifically non-sexual.   

Personally, I believe that pure friendship between the sexes is a myth. I’m not saying that there is NO way men and women can maintain a relationship without any emotional and/or physical intimacy. There is always the exception – for example, you’ve been friends since you were three and think of each other as family.   

But in my opinion, friendships between men and women are doomed to failure because there are just too many battles to fight. There is the beast called Physical Attraction. And if that doesn’t get you by the ankles, there’s the phantom called Emotional Intimacy waiting to pounce.   

It’s perhaps only possible to retain a platonic friendship if both parties are either legally bound or wisely choose to retain a distance between each other. Think about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. When they were first seen together they fed us that tired “we’re just friends” routine. They’re now known as Brangelina and, apparently, a wedding is on the horizon. If that happens, the “friends” will have to eat their wedding cake and words too. 

People like these are kidding you and ultimately themselves. Pulling the wool over everyone else’s eyes is harmless if you’re not already involved in a serious relationship but what if you are? How do you know if you have crossed that imperceptible but significant line that lies between friendship and something more?   

It’s all well and good if all you’re discussing with Minah/Ravi from the office is how the boss sounds (and looks!). But grousing about the boyfriend’s irritating habits to

Ravi

or the wife’s nagging to Minah is not a good idea. If you find yourself divulging more secrets to your friend than your wife or boyfriend, then I say, take a step back. 

For me, trusting your “friend” of the opposite sex more than your significant other is like a huge danger sign flashing over your head.   

We’re only human, after all, and very few (if any) have taken on the ogre called Temptation and won the fight. We all know the price of such a battle – broken hearts. 

So, it’s probably a good idea to steer away from dangerous waters. It’ll be too late to cast anchor when one day you wake up and discover that your Friend Ship has morphed into the Love Boat.

A Complicated Matter

Thursday, November 10th, 2005

Actually it’s not that complicated afterall, at least from my point of view. I was sitting across the cafe facing my friend after ordering my drink and something to munch on and we started by asking how each other are doing and all. You know how people says there’s only three things bothering guys which are money,career and women. So I knew all along that this friend of mine has something to tell and you guess it…he’s quite well-to-do and he works with his father!

This is very much like ‘Tell Thelma’ every Sunday in TheStar newspaper columns but the story began with him knowing this girl A who is barely 20 years old this year and he feels that she’s the kind,caring type who suits him as future wife but he never shows any feeling towards her eventhough she hinted to him that she is interested in him. So finally A gave up and accepted a new boyfriend who treats her very well. That’s when it hits my friend that he can’t lose her so he confessed to her his feelings but A asked him to give her time to break-up with her current boyfriend.

Then my friend left the country and met up with B who isn’t attached but used to has a liking for him and they spent a few days together and found out that they are quite fond of each other.However they never promised each other anything because B isn’t sure if she wants to come back to Malaysia to work. When my friend came back,he asked A whether she has broken off with the boyfriend and if not,maybe it’s better she does not tell the boyfriend about it because my friend feels that he might not be able to treat her better than the boyfriend.

A was so hurt she cried and accused him of giving her false hope and this makes my friend feeling guilty. Now I’m not the mushy kind of person and I admit I am not the best person to consult about men women relationships. The typical yet rusty engineering side of me just analyse, weigh out the pros and cons and make the decision….not much feelings involve.If only it’s that easy. I told him that what he does is correct. Just choose one.

Since A already has a boyfriend,I doubted anyone needs time to dump a person, so she isn’t the best choice. I just feel that she is being selfish and inmature for wanting both guys. She is just cheating her current boyfriend’s feeling because she does not love him as much as she loves my friend. Unlike A, B is not attached and a better potential for love to develope. B only has to work things out and if both really love each other, it shouldn’t be a problem for B to come back to work.

Of course the matter of hearts aren’t that easy. Now, men are just so weak when it comes to tears and women…or shall I say everyone is just being selfish? I feels that he just want both. If things doesn’t work out with A then he still has B but this isn’t some property or shares investment. This just show that he doesn’t love both that much. I definitely can’t put myself into so many situations at once but men…they can multitask. That’s why you see married men having mistresses. I might be wrong and my friend is definitely not satisfied with what I said. What about you?